So there i was. Sitting at Union Square. Hot day. Sitting in the sun. For about 20 minutes. Eating my sandwich. Drinking a Pellegrino. When I hear a yacking sound about 6 feet behind me. "uhhhggh. yaccccc. uuuuuhhhhhhhh." In coordination with a splattering. In my peripheral i could see it was a bummer lady with dreadlocks leaning her hand against a tree.. throwing up. I stand up in order to stay clear. When i notice that there was a girl laying under the tree, also standing up to stay clear. BUT!!! It was too late for her. She was thrown up on. Upon. Laying there. In the shade. Reading a book. Thrown-up-on. The throw upper says "sorry bout that..... im gonna get you some napkins." At which point i just stand there drop jawed. I offer my Pellegrino to maybe wash some of the puke off of her face or arm, or chest, or hair. She says "Sure." And she is kinda giggling, which was amazing to me. Because I was feeling sick. But i was also feeling like I was on a hidden camera show or something. It was just so mind blowing.
Anywho, there were two french girls a few feet away from all of this. They helped out the girl by using their bottled water. Washing her off. The throw-upper drops off some napkins, and moves along. Swiftly. I say "I am so sorry. My mind is blown. I dont know what to do." She says "This has never happened to me. This sucks." And i say "Yeah. I dont think this has happened to too many people. My mind is blown." She keeps nervously giggling. I keep swerving my head around to see if there are any hidden cameras. Mean while the French girl is sliding chunks out of the poor girls hair. Leading me to believe what I was witnessing was indeed the real deal. Just a simple case of getting thrown up on by a stranger. While laying under a tree, reading a book. On the face, chest, neck, head and arms. WTF?
Posted by daren wilson